Wednesday, August 5, 2009

How to Catch Bin Laden

No one is really sure if Osama Bin Laden is dead or alive, but I have come up with an idea for how to catch him (if alive), and other people wanted by the United States government, that will not only save American soldier lives, but also be much cheaper than fighting wars. My idea is to up the ante on information that leads to the capture of these people.

When we invaded Afghanistan and Iraq, we put a $25 million dollar price tag on Bin Laden's head. There were many problems with this number. First, no single person could collect the entire $25 million, and second it was to low. This number should have increased everyday until Bin Laden was either caught or his dead body was turned over. Imagine if you are one of Bin Laden's boys filming his message in the Afghanistan mountains, and you could get $100 million if you some how got a cell phone and told where in the mountains you all were camping out. For only $25 million, you might still think that the Jihad is worth fighting for, but for $100 million turning Bin Laden in might be worth it. Also, Osama would be so nervous over who to trust that he might start shooting his own guys. My evidence for why this will work, Ransom, the movie.

If you have not seen the movie, I will outline it briefly. Mel Gibson's son gets kidnapped, the kidnappers tell Gibson (a billionaire I believe) a ransom number, after a failed attempt to give them/capture the kidnappers, Gibson goes on TV and says that he will use the money he was going to give for his son to be return to anyone who hands over his son's kidnappers, and the number will increase until the person is turned over. The kidnappers have a leader who starts to freak out (Bin Laden in my ideas case) and kills all the people who helped him out. After some drama, Gibson's son is rescued, and the head kidnapper is also caught.

Now imagine you are one of Bin Laden's boys, moving from mountain camp to mountain camp, no A/C, or DirectTV. You cannot even watch the Superbowl. $100 million and immunity would probably sound like a better life than you currently are living. Some might believe that Bin Laden's followers are too loyal. Well ask yourself the same question, do you have friends that you would not turn in for $100 million, $200 million or maybe even $300 million? Maybe I am a bad friend for saying it, but I would expect my friends to turn me in if they could get $300 million. I would only ask them to share some with my family.

Some might also argue that giving money to terrorist, especially that amount is a terrible idea. My counter argument to this is, have you heard about how many American soldiers have died in Iraq, Afganistan, and other parts of the world? It would also be the biggest money saver our country could do. Instead of wasting billions of dollars fighting wars that many American people did not believe in, we spend $100 million having their own people oust their dictator. Of course, this is America, their money will be taxed, but maybe at the current capital gains number. We do not want to have the incentive to turn in people like Bin Laden be lost so we will tax them at a lower number.

We forget all to well how our country use to capture the outlaws in the wild wild west. They had "Wanted Dead or Alive" posters all over town. I am not coming up with a new idea, I am just using what has worked in the past. The President could even use Mel Gibson to tell Bin Laden's people how much his body is worth, they might sympathize with the anti-Semitic Gibson.